Clothes should fit you, not the other way around

The fabric that you're putting on your body should be complimenting you, should be fitting you, not YOU trying to squeeze into it.

If a piece of fabric doesn't flatter you, there's nothing wrong with you...

It's actually the piece of fabric that has something to do with it :)

When you're standing in the change room and you're trying on something new and then it gathers up in the wrong way or it's too loose, it's too tight, it's too that, it's too this. And then you think, Oh my God, it's me, it's my body. There's something wrong with me! I'm here to tell you that that's not true. It's actually not you at all.

3 Facts to why it's not about you

1. Different designers have different visions!

When you walk into a brand, every single brand has a designer and that designer has a vision for the fabric, the quality, the style, and they have this one vision, this one pathway on how they see their outfits on someone! It's about the designer.

So it's actually got nothing to do with you, it's to do with the vision of the brands. That is why sometimes you will be more drawn to a certain store. For example, when I go into certain stores, the way they do their bottoms does nothing for me. And that is okay because I know it's not about me at all. It's about the way that they have designed it. They've designed the style. It's about the designer.

The next time you're going shopping and you grab something that you love, but you feel like it's not flattering your body in any way, I want you to feel empowered to think, Oh, it's not me, it's the designer. And then move on to the next store.

2. Your body type is so unique

We are all built differently. What looks good on me might not look good on you. What looks good on you might not look good on her. We're all different. And I love that we each show up in our lives however we want to express fashion and use it as our personal style.

Fashion should be used as a way to speak up about who we actually are!

And we need to have a little bit more fun with it.

It's really important to find styles that complement your unique body type. Make sure you know your measurements! You want to measure around your shoulders, your bust, your waist, and your hips. Please understand your measurement.

You are empowered to know your own figure. And then you can have a look at what's happening with the fabric. Does that silhouette match your silhouette? Because we want to make sure that these clothes are fitting into our world. They have to be part of our yes checklist, not the other way around.

A mindset hack I love to always tell myself whenever I go shopping, and I have one of those moments where I go, Oh my God, it's my body...I stopped for a second and I think "I'm glad that the outfit did not work on me because it means that it will work on the next beautiful woman who really needs this look."

So try to change it to “My body shape is so unique and that piece of fabric just doesn't understand how unique it is.” Start flipping the script. It's about changing the way that you view fashion and taking more control of the way that you think, the way that you feel, and the way that you do anything.

And especially with dressing, because when it comes to dressing your body shape, it is one of the most vulnerable moments because it's so easy to let a piece of cotton make you feel a certain way. And I want you to stop. I want you to stop and think, no more. My body shape is so unique and that the piece of fabric has to fit with ME, with my lifestyle, with who I am!

3. Some styles are supposed to be worn a certain way.

So let's say you're scrolling online and you have a look at this beautiful model and she's in this beautiful dress, and you think, Yes, I can wear that. I can pull that off. Oh, I can see myself in that.

The truth is sometimes we can't and that's okay because we shouldn't be looking exactly like the model in the magazine. We shouldn't be dressing exactly like the mannequin. The reason for that is because they have stylists. Their stylist is literally working for perfection. They are manipulating the fabric to better shoot it so that you are sold on it. Their stylists are choosing the right undergarments to create the illusion of curves.

Even toning down curves, they're pinning the fabric back behind the model. So many times I've worked on a photo shoot where they have actually pinned the outfit behind to fit the model. They're using certain lights.

So I really want you to understand that what you see online, that one outfit that is so cute, is actually very scripted. It's a filter. It's time that you are scrolling online and that you are falling in love with this outfit. Just remember this, it's a filter.

It's literally scripted to make you buy the outfit. And this is why I want you to understand that you shouldn't have to feel the need to look like the model because the model doesn't even look like her. And the same way goes for mannequins.

They have paid stylists coming into their store, picking a theme, and then dressing the mannequin a certain way for you to buy. No wonder why we get so caught up on how we feel and who we are as people because we're so manipulated by strategic styling.

So the next time that you're doubting yourself and you are looking at your appearance and you're thinking, Oh my gosh, it's me. I really want you to stop and say, No, no, no, it's not me. It's a piece of clothing. It's not me at all.

And you've just learnt because this comes back to the different designers out there, different unique body shapes that we all have, or that the style is just supposed to be worn a certain way and sometimes it's been a little manipulated for you to buy. And remember, there are plenty of styles out there. So don't give up. Do not give up. Don't try one style and then say that that is the end.

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